It can be soooooo painful!

You sit down and ask your kid to write ONE sentence … one little sentence …

And it turns into begging … “PLEEEEASE … anything … something …”

And they look at you like you with a blank stare -- or they start to cry -- OR they throw their pencil across the room.

BUT - it doesn’t have to be that way! You can work on “writing” without having it turn into a battle or a cry fest.

To do it, you have to break writing down into its parts and pieces, figure out what’s working and what isn’t, and then focus your efforts on what’s going to make the most different.

And today -- I’m going to tell you how to do just that!

NOTE: I mention LOTS of different resources in today’s video. If you want to check them out, here are some links:

Spelling Resources

Sequential Spelling Books

Sequential Spelling Online

All About Spelling

Handwriting Resources

Handwriting without Tears

Storytelling Resources

Tell Tale Game

Rory Story Cubes

Transcript

Hello, my name's ToriAnn Perkey, and from my homeschool to your homeschool, today I want to talk about what you can do and think about if you have a reluctant writer.

I'm talking about those kids who are in elementary school particularly who you say, “Okay, just write a sentence. Just write a sentence.” And they're like, “Oh, I don't want to write a sentence.” And it feels like you are extracting blood from a stone if you ask them to write anything.

Or they get started, and they just seem to sit there forever, and you know that they have great ideas because they can tell them to you, but they won't write them.

Well, today I want to talk about how writing is actually divided into four different sub-pieces that all have to come together to make a writer who can write. And sometimes what happens is developmentally a kid will be ready for two of the four but not the other two. 

So even though you know they can write, they're actually not ready to write.  So, we're going to talk about that today. This is a topic I feel really passionate about because I know that if you push writing too soon, and you're too hard on it, you'll have a kid who - when they hit an age when they might have an amazing thing to say - will hate writing, and they'll just say, “I hate it. I don't want to do it.” And you don't want that to happen.

You want your kids to graduate into an age and a mental space where they like writing and they're excited to write because there's so much good that happens with writing.

So, let's talk about this. What are the four different subtopics that go into writing?

They are spelling, handwriting (or typing is kind in there) … but spelling, handwriting - because most kids don't type at this age - sentence and paragraph structure, and then ideas. And as you can see, you need all four of those to be able to write a sentence on a piece of paper.

You say, “Hey, tell me a sentence about what we did yesterday.”  They have to be able to spell - or at least they think they have to be able to spell - but they have to be able to spell to some extent or you won't have any idea what they're writing. They have to be able to write it - physically write it. They have to be able to structure the sentence in such a way that it actually translates from their brain into something coherent on the page, and they have to have an idea of what to write.

That's a lot of different skills for kids to wrap their brain around, and you might have a kid who's fabulous with ideas. I mean, FABULOUS with ideas, right? They will tell you stories and their dreams and this happened and this happened, but when you ask them to write, they can't because handwriting is hard. Or maybe they're worried about their spelling, even though you've told them it does not matter what it's spelled like, you just want them to put it down! You don't know.

And so my recommendation is this. If you have a kid where these four skills are not coming together seamlessly -- and it does happen -- some kids just kind of pull these skills together and they just write. Yay, for happiness and easiness! But for the kids where it's a little bit trickier, my recommendation is to pull the skills apart and work on them one-on-one, because you don't want to have ideas stagnate while handwriting is being worked on.

So you want to be able to work on them separately, have ideas continue to grow, have the handwriting catch up, or get to the point where the kid can type and then that helps, and then you can put all the skills back together.

There are resources that specifically target each one of these. You don't need to do all of these resources if things are working or if you see that the skill is already developing, but if it's not developing, then finding a resource that specifically targets one of these skills is a really great idea.

For example, if you're working on spelling, then you're going to go find a curriculum just for spelling, and there's a couple that I'm really, really fond of.  One is called Sequential Spelling, and you can do that with workbooks, or they now have an online version. Yay, that we're using.

I really like sequential spelling - and this isn't a review about that - but I like it because it just approaches spelling in a different way for holistic learners, and I guess I'll leave a link to that so you can go check it out. Another one that's super popular with spelling is "All About Spelling," which is a very different style of teaching spelling, but it uses a method that works well with dyslexics. So, these are some different resources. 

If you're struggling with handwriting then the bar none hands down best way to work on handwriting for a kid who's struggling is a program called Handwriting without Tears, and I'll leave a link to that as well. In Handwriting with Tears, we have now been using it with just a couple of my kids. The other ones didn't have any trouble, but a couple needed to work on handwriting, and it is definitely the best program I've seen. I don't get any pushback. Super, super simple, and I'm not even using the teacher guides. We're just using the student manuals. Just a little side note.

If you're working on sentence and paragraph structure, then the best way to work on that is to actually practice having them tell you the sentences and then watch you write them or type them. Have them practice speaking the sentences before they have to write the sentences.  Say, “You know what? I need you to say that in a complete sentence.” Help them learn to structure. Correct their grammar. Correct those things as you're talking to them. So, narration and dictation - and there's lots of resources out there for that, and you can even just use the scriptures or a picture book.  Narration and dictation are really, really good for that. I don't have a specific curriculum for that. I just wanted to let you know.

And then ideas - oh my goodness - I don't know of anybody really struggles with kids having ideas and things to write about when you pull these other skills out. But on the off chance that you want to just burnish those skills a little bit, I love using storytelling games for this.

Storytelling games are all verbally done. They're not written, and they allow the kids to definitely, definitely, definitely practice creating stories, being creative, pulling their ideas out of their head and into a space where they can be enjoyed and experienced together without all of the other things. I have reviewed several storytelling resources over the course of doing this - making these videos - and I will link to those so you can go check out my reviews in the review section, and my videos that specifically talk about those resources.

So, there you have it. There you have it. Break down those writing skills into four separate distinct categories, and if you do that, you are definitely going to find that you can augment the ones that are working, take away the ones that aren't - not take them away, but actually focus on them and help supplement them and bring them up so that in good time all of those skills will come together and take a reluctant writer to a writer that's actually writing.

I'm ToriAnn Perkey, and I make these videos every week so that you can be a super successful and confident homeschool mom.

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OR

I’ll pull out the new curriculum that I’ve researched and poured over and been all excited about … and my kid will decide they HATE it before I even crack the cover.

And it is sooooooo easy to want to give up in that moment.

To throw up my hands and say “FINE!”

And that’s happened on occasion. I’m not proud of it … but it’s true.

But over the years, I’ve learned there is a better way to handle a situation like this.

And recently a friend of mine gave me the PERFECT phrase to help me remember what to do.

And that’s what I’m sharing with you today. 🙂

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These books are full of solid science, but with all the “gross” bits left in. But I find that even my girls enjoy the humor and style.

And I enjoy how easily the content is absorbed into their brain. 🙂

CLICK HERE to check it out for your homeschool.

Transcript

Hello, my name's ToriAnn Perkey, and from my homeschool to your homeschool, I want to tell you about why we're horribly excited about science.That's because we have this really cool series of books called "Horrible Science." Have you heard about these? First of all, I have to show you -- we have a lot of them. 

Look at all those titles, you guys. I love these books! They come from the same people who do "Murderous Maths" and "Horrible Histories." I don't know you may have seen their videos on YouTube. "Horrible Histories" has videos, but today we're going to talk about "Horrible Science" because we are doing science right now in our homeschool, and we're specifically focusing on chemistry. So, I wanted to show you the chemistry book.

Let me tell you a little bit about why I like the "Horrible Science" series. First of all, they're all about making things really funny, and they don't take themselves at all seriously. In fact, if Monty Python could meet science, this would be the book. They actually do come from England.

That's where the author is from -- Nick Arnold. And these books are full -- I'm going to show you -- full of -- let's see if I can get that to focus -- full of really silly pictures. It's not one cohesive story. There are little bits and pieces.  Think of it like a television show that's broken up into bits kind of like a "Bill Nye the Science Guy" television show.

There are pages that have lots of pictures, and they read more like a comic book, and then there are other pages that do tend to be a little denser in the content. Now, the content is solid. You're going to be learning whether -- and I'll go through a couple of these titles.

Whatever the topic is you're going to be learning solid, solid science, but in a way that appeals particularly to boys or girls that like kind of squishy stuff. Because it never ever ever talks about things in a super serious tone. It's always about why things explode, or why things are kind of gross, or why things are different. And whether they're talking about the history and the scientists who were involved in major discoveries or they're talking about how in this case atoms and molecules come together, they're going to tell it in a way that makes it super engaging and super fun.

Oh my goodness, we have read multiple versions of the series "Horrible Science," "Horrible Histories," and they make us laugh. And any time your kids are laughing … WIN! ... that means learning is happening.

So, the chemistry one is called "Chemical Chaos," and I love that they also do a lot of alliteration. So, we have "Painful Poison," "Killer Energy," "Fight for Flight." There's one here about "Ugly Bugs," and that's going to be all about the microscopic.

What are some other ones? Ooh, here we go "Bulging Brains: I'm a Bundle of Nerves" and the puns. It says "100 Percent Horrible." I love these books.

"Deadly Diseases: Evolve or Die," and obviously this is going to be a very traditional evolution book. So, if that's something that bothers you, you want to be aware of that.  "Fatal Forces" here's one. "Fatal Forces" it's all -- what does it say? "It's Crunch Time," and so here we are forces, and he's going to step on the snail. I wish I could just sit down and read this to you guys. It's just funny.

So, the forces one is going to be all about like Newton science and the different Newton's forces and physics. That's the word I was looking for ... physics … but again it's just -- there are quizzes, there are games, there are horrible health warnings. It's just really fun.

So if this looks like something that would be interesting to you, I will link you to the best place to buy these. It's actually not Amazon, surprise! It's a different website. That's where I buy all my "Horrible" stuff, and the link will be up above or down below. I highly recommend you check it out because it's going to be horribly awesome.

I'm ToriAnn Perkey, and I make meet these videos every week so that you can be a super successful and confident homeschool mom.

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This post is for you. 🙂

Because I have something to admit …

Right now one of my kids is really struggling with math.

And despite everything I’ve done, I can’t seem to find something that will work for this kid.

So I thought I’d make a short video to explain what I’m going to do. Hopefully, it will help.

Transcript

Hello, my name’s ToriAnn Perkey and from my homeschool to your homeschool, can I just be vulnerable for a minute and tell you something we're kind of struggling with in my homeschool right now?

You know I like to make these videos, and I talk about all the cool stuff we do and all the cool things we use and like to give you guys lots of resources and tips, but want you to know it is not all peaches and cream over here on my side of the fence. There are some times when we really, really struggle.

And right now we are really, really struggling with one of my kids and math. And this is not for lack of effort on this kid's part. This is not for lack of effort on my part. I have researched. I have looked for different options. We have tried different curriculum. We have tried playing games. We have tried, and this kid has reached a point in math where it's just getting hard.

It's way past abstract. it's way past just memorizing or doing the facts. Qnd it's really become abstract. And their brain is just not clicking with the abstract. And there are tears, and it's frustrating -- for me and for them. And you know, part of me just keeps saying, Hey, keep trying. We'll explain it another way.

But it's really affecting our homeschool because this kid is so frustrated and they want to give up and they wanted ...they're just done with math. And they're so, so frustrated. And I thought a lot about ... I've been thinking about it. I was like, Okay, well it's not okay to give up. Right?

So we've got to keep working. We've got to keep trying. But right now I'm trying to make the decision of whether or not we pull back and just pause and do other things, or whether I go searching for yet another solution for this kid who just does not seem to grasp these abstract mathematical concepts. Or do I hire a tutor or do I try to find a class that they can take?

I'm wrestling with all these questions. And the reason I wanted to make this video is I wanted to tell you guys that this is part of the process. It's not like you find,...I mean sometimes you find the perfect curriculum and you're off to the races and you're done.

But there's a lot of times where you don't always find the perfect thing. Or your kids -- you start out and it's working and then your kids change. They get older, you know, or you add a baby, or life just gets different. And when that happens or ... the material gets harder, right? Like it just gets harder. And suddenly what was fun isn't fun anymore. And I think that it can be really easy to get discouraged and think that you're doing something wrong when in fact you are living a homeschool life.

And homeschooling means that you are constantly in observation and problem-solving mode. And I'm always watching -- Is this working?

And if it's not working, what do I need to do? Do I need to just push? Do they need to work a little bit harder? Do I need to find a different resource? Do I need to approach it differently? Do I need to look at myself? Am I causing a problem? Like I'm looking at everything when I'm doing this.

And when I'm willing to take the time. And it doesn't always like solve all at once, right? Sometimes we don't get the answer right away. I don't get the answer right away. And for me it also includes prayer and it includes, you know, thinking and meditation and pondering and journaling sometimes. And I'm just, What is ... what's the next step?

And when you embrace that, that's part of the homeschooled journey. When you embrace that, you shift to a different mindset about homeschooling. It's no longer about are we doing it right, but are we doing it so that it works right now?

So I wanted to tell you guys that. I wanted to tell you guys that even though there's this situation with this kid and in the moment we're frustrated and it's hard, I'm not giving up. I'm not going to let them give up. We might take a break, but we're going to figure it out. We are going to figure it out because I've seen that happen over and over again.

If we figure ... if we take our time, if we're thoughtful, if I look -- answers show up. The right people show up. The right resources show up. Things happen and line up and I'm open to all the possibilities. I don't shut anything down because I want to make sure that I'm finding the one that's going to be the right one.

And I'm not talking about like I'm spending hours and hours and hours researching curriculum every night. I mean I am doing some research because I'm looking for something new, and I'm asking people questions and all of that. I'm just talking about taking the time to let the idea percolate and work in my brain and to pause to hear answers.

And so yeah guys, it's not all a walk in the park and sometimes things are kind of rough. And I'm not giving up and I don't want you to give up because I promise you're going to find an answer. You will find an answer that works for you and your kid if you stay in problem-solving, answer-finding mode. Because that's what this is all about.

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